I didn’t get to sleep at a decent hour last night. Today has just been a really bum day. I woke up around nine and went back to sleep until about one thirty in the afternoon. I haven’t been feeling emotionally well after an hour of emotionally negative attacks last night.
Angel has depression, anxiety, and multiple personality disorder (MPD). The last of the three is something that I have known about since day one. She can switch between being different people on the fly. Sometimes it seems that she is a cross between two. I think this has to do with her improving condition in that they are somewhat merging into one person.
I have accepted her MPD and tried to be understanding. However, I try to treat her as a normal person. This gets me into problems. It may sometimes appear that I do not acknowledge her condition. The problem is that I actually can’t tell, or that I am just not a very observant person. Even when I am observant, I would have to give a few guesses before I can tell her who I think she is. She has names for each personality (or most of them).
So with these three conditions, sometimes we misread each other. Actually, it is very hard for her to read me because I always close up when I hear things I don’t like. I’m an emotional clam. I’m actually not good with emotions at all. I can’t express myself. I am very open minded, but I live inside my head. I’m a loner in a way. I’m also suffer from depression.
We are so much as opposites that this is probably why we are still together. No matter what has happened before, we are still together. We haven’t given up on each other, but we have done a lot of emotional damage. I’ve had good times and bad. I just hope she still sticks with me for a long time.